It started with a colleague quietly stepping off a call, saying she didn’t want to upset her husband. It wasn’t the first time I’d heard that line, and I wasn’t the only one who’d used it. Among high-performing women, especially those navigating leadership roles in Brussels’ policy world, these quiet concessions are more common than we admit. They’re not dramatic. They’re subtle. But over time, they add up. And for many of us, they’ve become the early signs of something deeper: burnout, breakdown, and the quiet reckoning that follows.
They are executives, diplomats, consultants, and entrepreneurs. They’ve built careers, raised families, and led teams. And now, many of them are burning out.
Not metaphorically. Clinically.
“It’s not that we’re weak. It’s that we’ve been strong for too long.”
The Data Doesn’t Lie
In 2025, burnout is no longer a fringe issue; it’s a systemic one. According to the World Health Organization, burnout now affects nearly 48% of the global workforce. In Belgium, the number of people unable to work for more than a year due to burnout or depression has surged by 44% over the past five years.
Women in leadership roles are particularly vulnerable. A recent Gallup study found that 43% of female leaders report feeling burned out “very often or always,” compared to 31% of men in similar roles.
“Burnout isn’t a buzzword. It’s a public health crisis.”
The economic cost is staggering. Mental health-related absenteeism is estimated to cost the global economy over $1 trillion annually, with Germany alone reporting €77 billion in lost productivity in 2023.
But the cost to individuals, especially high-performing women in midlife, is harder to quantify.
Burnout vs. Breakdown: What’s the Difference?
Burnout is a workplace syndrome, now formally recognized by the WHO. It’s characterised by:
- Emotional exhaustion
- Cynicism or detachment from work
- A sense of ineffectiveness
Breakdown, often referred to as a “nervous breakdown,” is broader. It’s what happens when chronic stress spills beyond the workplace and overwhelms the nervous system. It can manifest as:
- Panic attacks or anxiety
- Depression or emotional numbness
- Inability to function in daily life
“Burnout is the warning light. Breakdown is the engine failure.”
Burnout can lead to breakdown if left unaddressed. And for many women, the tipping point comes not from weakness, but from years of over-functioning.
The Brussels Bubble Effect
In Brussels, where policy meets pressure, the risks are amplified. The city’s international institutions, lobbying firms, and NGOs attract high achievers from across Europe. But the culture of constant availability, political complexity, and emotional labor can be quietly corrosive.
Add to that the rising trend of “gray divorce”, with divorce rates among women aged 50–64 increasing steadily across the EU, and you have a perfect storm of personal and professional upheaval.
Red Flags: What High Performers Often Miss
High-achieving women are trained to push through discomfort. But ignoring early warning signs, both at work and in relationships, can be costly.
At Work:
- Blurred boundaries and “always on” expectations
- Micromanagement or manipulation
- Lack of psychological safety
- Values misalignment
In Relationships:
- Charm without consistency
- Emotional unavailability
- Gaslighting or subtle control
- A persistent sense of shrinking yourself
“If you’re constantly shrinking to fit, it’s not a role, it’s a red flag.”
Recognising these patterns early is not just self-care; it’s strategic leadership.
How Long Does Recovery Take?
There’s no universal timeline, but clinical data offers a guide:
- Acute burnout recovery: 3–6 months
- Full nervous system recalibration: 12–18 months
- Reintegration into high-functioning roles: Gradual, and often with a new pace
“Recovery isn’t linear. It’s a recalibration of your entire system.”
Recovery involves cycles of clarity, grief, rest, and redefinition. And for many women, it’s the first time they’ve allowed themselves to stop striving.
To Stop or Pivot? The New Thinking
Conventional wisdom says: take a break. But for high performers, a full stop can feel destabilizing. The emerging consensus among trauma-informed coaches and psychologists is more nuanced:
- Full Stop: Ideal when the nervous system is in survival mode. Think sabbatical, medical leave, or a complete pause.
- Strategic Pivot: A gentler shift, consulting, creative work, or part-time roles, that maintains structure while reducing pressure.
“The question isn’t whether to stop or pivot. It’s whether you’re choosing from self-trust or survival.”
Policy Is Catching Up Slowly
The EU’s Mental Health Strategy (2023–2025) calls for mental health to be treated on par with physical health, with funding for workplace wellbeing and national action plans. Belgium recognizes burnout as a legitimate occupational illness, entitling employees to long-term sick leave, income protection, and reintegration support.
But implementation is patchy. Only 7% of Belgian employers have fully adopted burnout prevention and reintegration policies.
“Until systems evolve, boundaries remain your best protection.”
From Breakdown to Breakthrough
Here’s what rarely makes headlines: many women emerge from burnout not broken, but reborn.
They:
- Launch purpose-driven businesses
- Redefine success around values, not validation
- Lead with empathy, boundaries, and emotional intelligence
“They don’t bounce back. They build back better; on their own terms.”
The Takeaway
If you’re in the thick of it, burned out, breaking down, or just beginning to question everything, know this:
- You’re not alone.
- You’re not failing.
- You’re in transition.
“Burnout isn’t the end. It’s a signal. And for many women, it’s the beginning of a more powerful, purposeful chapter.”